FRIENDSHIP BREAKUPS | Have You Ever Experienced One?

Friendship breakups are like feeling a creeping dull stubborn ache in your side, while it’s mostly ignorable it never goes away. Unlike romantic breakups that feel like grabbing a super hot pan straight from the stove with your bare hands, a sharp pain that eventually subsides and heals.

There are no sad songs to listen to in friendship breakups or long lonely car rides to embark on, no sad TV shows to binge while you stuff your face with chocolate and red velvet cakes or maybe the sweetest caramel popcorn just to stay distracted, there are no routines -with friends. 

How do you move on from someone you once cry-laughed with? Shared your vulnerabilities with? Your secrets? One who was there through every romantic heartbreak or happy moment? 

How do you say -I got dumped by my friend?

To move on you have to choose to lose more friends because you both ran in the same circles. 

When it comes to making friends, I’m what you call lousy. Most people say I’m a snub and they wonder how I make friends. You see, the difficult part for me is making them, but the moment someone becomes my friend they have my entire heart and soul. Through thick and thin until you decide I’m not enough. 

But why wasn’t I enough? Why won’t you tell me you’ve grown away from the friendship? Why ghost someone you call your friend?

Also read: HOW TO STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU

You see, I have experienced friendship breakups I could write a book on it. There’s no room to use the line “it’s not you, it’s me”. Your heartbreak can’t be shared, because unlike romantic breakups how do you explain you weren’t good enough to a friend?

So, I’ve decided to adopt the Yom Kippur prayer, for every form of heartbreak I feel and not just friendship breakups. 

I forgive you. I forgive me. 

For outgrowing me, for losing interest in you, for anything annoying, backstabbing, hurtful, offensive either one of us must have said to each other. 

I forgive you. I forgive me. 

For being flawed humans. For having new goals that don’t align with each other, for choosing ourselves first before the friendship. 

I forgive you. I forgive me. 

XX. 

Ucheyy.